So, happy birthday to my Sasha. She turned three on November 2. I feel bad for her in a way. I was way more active in chronicling life when we lived in Alaska. It's harder now for a couple of reasons. First, I am far more busy at work than I used to be. Second, I am just not as excited about the blog as when I lived in Alaska. Life since I left Alaska has been hard. In particular, this building has drained all of our earnings away. It was supposed to take 6 months and $100,000. It has taken over 16 months and $300,000. That 'extra' $200,000 was money that I could have used to build my life. Instead it has all gone into this place. So I am still renting. Still deeply, deeply in debt. The only good news is that the building should be done by the new year. We have some furnishing to do but I think we are within $70,000 of being done. As God is my witness, 2013 is the last damned year that I will be broke. Otherwise things are fine. The kids are doing well. Growing far too quickly. I have reasons to believe that I will get to spend more time with them soon. I am starting to almost resent this building because of the energy and resources it has taken. But we will have the nicest law office in town. The back is now furnished and looking great. So, despite my frequent despair over the last year as we struggled and fought and worried, there is every reason to feel optimistic. I just can't live with this worry and regret hanging over my head. And, quite frankly, the only solution is money. Lots of it. I'll never understand people who say money doesn't buy happiness. I wish I could punch those people in the face. If I had the money that I could ever spend I would spend the rest of my life doing what I wanted. Where I wanted. And Alaska, of course, would be right up there. To cheer myself up I often look at photos of the Great Land. Then hand my contractor another stack of cash. Dream of the day when every single goddamned penny I earn doesn't go into construction. Adventures in the place I call home call.....my heart aches for it.

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