So, I have to wonder if everyone who has a third child goes through this? The shift in family dynamics? The acting up of the now middle child. The extra time it takes to do everything. The shift in responsibilities. The constant wondering over how to pay for everything. Can I do it? Of course. But what do we give up to pay for the extra $100 a month in just diapers? I already don't eat lunch out very often. I make my own coffee. Is there excess? Sure. But what do I do? Drive less? Buy less groceries? Get rid of more stuff? I cannot deny being exasperated lately trying to sort all this out. I have to wonder if every working family goes through this. Sigh. Will we starve? Of course not. But can I give my kids everything I want to? No. And right now I'm just not sure where the money is going to come from for things like diapers. One paycheck + 5 people + one small house + a couple toys + bad luck = how the fu&* do I do this?

Comments

Why would you make your own coffee when there is perfectly reasonably priced coffee at Arctic Fox?
Anonymous said…
How about cloth diapers instead of store-bought disposable diapers?
Anonymous said…
most families of 5 have 2 sources of income...either a working spouse or a part time job.
Hawksbill said…
I have heard from families with 5 or more children that the 1st and the 3rd are the hardest to get used to. The 1st one because you're new to the whole thing and the 3rd one for the reasons you mentioned and because you're outnumbered for the first time.

Apparently, once you hit 4 or more kids it's like eating potato chips or getting tattoos... you're already overwhelmed and one more is barely noticeable. Or something like that. :)
Susan Stevenson said…
I'm going to second the cloth diapers. I was a single mom earning minimum wage, and cloth diapers were the only way I could afford to keep my baby clothed. And if I ran out of diapers, I fashioned a few from receiving blankets!

Do you qualify for WIC?
Anonymous said…
why do you think you are any different to any family of five living from pay check to pay check there are people who cant have any children.you are so lucky to have a wife and family.
Anonymous said…
Not to be an ass, but a hundred bucks a month will buy a lot of condoms. A vasectomy is easy, close to painless, and cheap if you have insurance. I don't understand people who have a minivan full of kids and then complain about the cost, the work and so on. Nor do I understand people - and this might not be you - who just go on W.I.C. and so on without a moment of thought, expecting the rest of us to pay them to raise kids. There's a lot of talk about reproductive freedom. How about talking about reproductive responsibility?
A lot of good comments. No to WIC. Even if were eligible, there are people who need it more. A lot more. Regarding reproductive responsibility I couldn't agree more. To say Sasha was a surprise would be an understatement. Not that it is the business of the world but I have been fixed. There won't be more. There won't be a second job in this house; that is not possible. Cloth diapers? We have thought about it. Don't know why we don't try.
tiny tim said…
Ben, I'd have to disagree. There were not a lot of good comments on here. First of all, three children is not a time to judge a family's reproductive choices. Secondly, I feel like you got a lot of misdirected comments that should have gone to people who do need to look into birth control. Not responsible families who work hard for each child! Finally, as to comparing "4 or more kids" to eating potato chips or getting tattoos, I'm sure everyone hopes each of their kids will feel more special than that. As for cloth diapers, the reason you haven't tried it is because its A TON of work for a mom who has three girls on her hands all day!
Hawksbill said…
Tiny Tim, my comment about eating potato chips and getting tattoos was meant as a light hearted joke, not serious social commentary. That's why I put the little emoticon at the end.

But, I agree with your comments about cloth diapers. The level of effort involved is insane. And, as far as criticizing people who have 3+ children, that's just silly and rude to do. However many children a family has, it's their business and nobody else's as far as I'm concerned.

Our blog owner here owes nobody an explanation for his family.
J said…
I do what I can to help minimize our living costs but theres not much I can do at this point.
We have talked about the cloth diaper issue and I am in no way against the idea or un willing to try, every little helps.

Its an interesting time for us all, an adjustment for the girls having to be a little more patient with me but I don't feel too much has changed for me anyway.
I do love being a mother, looking at all my beautiful precious girls I am truly very lucky.
Well I wasn't offended. I put my life out there and there is an argument for having less kids. Or none. Is there a part of me that is jealous of my DINK friends and co-workers? You bet your ass. But that ship has sailed. All is well. It will work out. My children are happy and healthy. Is there more than that? No.
Happy Thanksgiving, guy!
Anonymous said…
I think what you're going through with AJ is normal - middle kids (especially girls) end up with attitudes like hers. And her attention-seeking attitude will be lifelong, so you may as well make some effort now to make her feel special, and a plan for the long-term.
Anonymous said…
i do not agree with last comment about it affecting her all her life.aj is no different to anyone else,she was the youngest what do you expect.it is a adjustment for her and all the family.

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