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Showing posts from October, 2007
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So, happy Alaskan Halloween. I had intended this time to talk about my grim vision of the future and about how the choices that we make are sliding us into an ugly future. I still intend to write about that soon. Instead, despite the fact that this is a public forum, I intend instead to write about an intensely personal subject. I do so not for answers or sympathy. I do so with a full understanding the risk that scorn and derision may follow. I guess I do so only with the slim hope that writing about it will help focus my thoughts. Quite simply, I am depressed. I cannot address why. I cannot get around the fact that objectively, there is no reason to feel the way I do. I am where I want to be. Doing what I want. I am generally healthy and happy. I am surrounded by some of the finest people on Earth. I cannot ignore the fact that my feelings impact those around me and my relationships suffer. Yet I cannot shake this feeling. It is like concrete setting around me. It is awful. I am havi…
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So, I'm back. And, as predicted, the most useful part of the conference was meeting many of my fellow attorneys. I am amazed at the ability of the Agency to gather such a fine group of people. I didn't get to meet everyone but I think I was impressed with every one I did meet. I was pleasantly surprised at some of the people I met. Of course seeing old friends was worth its weight in gold. One thing I think the Agency could do is make it a little more about socializing and rallying the troops. If I was in charge I would make it about reminding everyone about what we do: representing the little man. We are charged with the sacred duty of preserving the freedom in one of the most free places left on earth. Making us feel good about what we do would probably be more useful than teaching us substantive law. I did win one award however: the award for representing the "biggest criminal" in Alaska. I sent in a number of Kenai cases. Needless to say even the "losers&quo…
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So, life goes on as it must. That includes a little spruce grouse hunting. Winterizing the boat. Making beer. You know, the usual stuff. Next week I am going to the mandatory 3 day training the Alaska Public Defender Agency puts on each year. This year it is at Alyeska Resort in Girdwood again. To be honest, I look forward to meeting all my fellow attorneys more than the classes. Some will be old friends. Others will be attorneys I only know by phone but am looking forward to meeting. I find I get a better education by telling war stories with other attorneys than by sitting in class. But that is just me. This year I have been designated the unofficial beer maker. What started with the idea I would take up some beer for G and I, has turned into the "Kenai hospitality suite". So I am taking 5 kegs of beer and will share them with the entire Agency it seems. That will give us a chance to talk not only of our success and failures but our bitches too. Like my bitch that I was su…
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So, the cost of life in Alaska grew today. Last night a moose (apparently) kicked my old hound dog in the head. Today, I had to have him put down. That seems calm enough but I wailed like a baby at the vet. There was no way I could do it after all we had been through. Like the time we had a party at Brian's house to save his eye. Charged $100 a plate for a 6 course meal, booze and a jazz band. Dozens of people showed up to save Gromit's eye because a stick was stuck in it and UC Davis wanted $1500 to save it. Like the time the police had to hold him because they were arresting me. Hunting for deer with Steve Cope. The time he rolled in some of Steve Cope's poop when we were hunting and I didn't notice it until after I had started petting him. How he saved the next door neighbors lives when their house caught fire and he woke me up and I had to wake them up (that earned him a prime rib dinner). How I cried when I saw him in California after my mother watched him when I …
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So, it begins! This is the blessed stuff that keeps all the people in California and other similar hell-holes from moving here. Oh God, it is below 80! And other such nonsense. God, I love this weather. I am a cold blooded person and the cold makes me literally giddy. Unfortunately, most of the snow melted today. But it will be back. The cold and the dark are coming. And I love it. Time to hunker down and enjoy hot foods. A fire. A good movie. Whiskey and coke. Time with my little girl. My trial in Homer ended in a mistrial. As a defense lawyer, my favorite word (after "not" guilty, of course) is "mistrial". If I have to try it again, I will do a better job as I know the State's case. I wish I had taken my camera to Homer. If you ever go to Homer you should check out the Lands End Resort (http://lands-end-resort.com/). The view was a amazing and after work I would sit on the deck with a drink and watch humpback whales. The view reminded me of why we are he…
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So, just a quick note. Tomorrow I have to go to Homer to do a felony DUI trial. It'll be the first time since we moved here that I have to leave my family for a week to do a trial. I am not happy. At all. But I have to go. At least the weather is beautiful. Amazing actually. Took the boat out one last time this weekend. I can't wait for next summer, despite the fact that the Oldsmobile 455 sucks back the fuel. I hope this week goes better than last. I had it last week. It did get better when I won a major suppression motion last friday. I am now 2 for 2 on litigated suppression motions. Perhaps the DA will actually learn to respect me. I don't file frivolous motions and I don't run around crying that every client is absolutely innocent. So when I say someone is innocent or that the cops acted illegally, it would be nice if the DA would listen. If not, I'll just have to keep winning! Anyways, I'm going to go spend time with the family before I have to go away. …
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So, here is our new kid. 9 weeks old. Approximately 1 inch long. Already has arms and legs. No wonder I think abortion is wrong. I'm not trying to create a debate here: I realize reasonable
people can disagree on this topic. But for me personally, and only for me, I'm amazed at this little life already. Or maybe I'm just amazed at how much he or she really looks like a little dollar sign already.
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So, I had one of those "public defender" days today. Unless you have been a public defender, you will not know what I am talking about. Even private defense counsel don't know what it is like, although it is close. One of those days where you realize that the "justice" system is corrupt. Rigged against your client. Designed to screw your client. Where you watch the DA's do whatever they want and never get called on it. Knowing that if you pulled the same stunt the judge would do everything he or she could to see you disbarred. Watch judges do whatever they want, which, for some reason, is always what the State wants. I guess I have written about this before, but I had one of those days where I wanted desperately, frantically to do anything else. I am tired of trying to hold back the tide of tyranny. I am tired of trying to save those who don't want to be saved. I am so tired of the double standard that exists between the Defense and the State. I am tire…